So you’re going to live forever? Like on fame?

I am only nineteen years old, but since my early teens I have been aware that life moves fast. So fast, that oftentimes the present is gone before I remember to enjoy it. I have great hopes and dreams for my future, things I want to do places I want to go, but all of those will mean so much less if I keep looking to the next thing.
I spent this morning looking at future classes, making my ‘to do’ list, and connecting with people from home. But here I am, in Thailand and down to my last month. It feels almost impossible that time has gone by so fast. It seems not that long ago that I was in the airport at 4 in the morning crying and hugging my parents goodbye. I wasn’t sure I could do five months in a foreign country on my own, without family or friends, or even any familiar faces. I continued to feel that way till I was sick in the hospital and talking to my mom for the first and only time on the phone. I realized then that I could get through anything. By the grace of God of course.
These past few months have been trying and amazing. They have left me feeling unstoppable and even more ambitious than I was before. It isn’t just the trip to Thailand; it’s the day to day accomplishments. It’s successfully ordering and paying for lunch in Thai by myself; it’s missing my family like crazy and still being able to enjoy what’s around me, and it’s really caring for someone who I understand only half the time. None of these things happened right way, but the difficulties I went through made each one of my little accomplishments so much bigger.
I can come up with a hundred ideas of what my future might look like, and lord knows I’ll put time and effort into preparing for it. But it would be foolish of me not take part in what is happening now. After all, the future will be the present soon enough.
Catch you on the flip side.

"Well, like the philosopher Jagger once said, 'You can’t always get what you want.'"

..........But you get what you need.As I live more I realize how little my failures are compared to the big picture.

If I do my best and give the rest up to God, than my failures are not failures, but I chance for me to learn and depend more on God. And to live my life to its very fullest I need depend on God at all times.
Today I didn't do as well on a test as I wanted to. I did all I could to prepare and preformed to the fullest of my ability, outside of that I gave it to God and said "let your will be done today." I didn't do well. After my initial discouragement, I turned to God and asked what I was supposed to learn from this experience. And God is showing me.

Now this approach did not come to me naturally at first. It took some set backs and failures to realize that I can't make on my own, and that I need God's help in every aspect of my life.

When I say "let your will be done," I know that things will end out OK, because God has nothing but the best planned for me.

So maybe I didn't do my best today. This just means I am going to work harder, and not give up because a situation became difficult.

God is working in my life to help me build endurance for the things he has planned for my future. And sure there may be pot holes, but that doesn't mean God is not taking care of me.

I hope our little heart to heart gave you some insight.

In my next post I intend to share some of the pictures from my portfolio.

Catch you on the flip side.

Rain or shine

This morning and yesterday morning I went running at my usual 6:15 am time. However for the past two days it has been pretty gross outside. But the rain didn't stop me.

Needless to say I am every proud of myself. I am not good at sticking to personal goals. If someone is depending on me I will fully pull through, but if it's just me, I'm known to give up on myself. Not this time.

The weather has dampened my mood though. I think it shows most through my boring clothing choices. I don't even keep the curls in my hair. This is a sign of true boredom.

I hear good weather is on the way. And since I finally have a tripod, you may see some outfit shots.

However, you can for sure expect some project pictures in the near future.

I will catch you all on the flip side.

You sound hecka fun

Today was a long day at work, and I am pretty tired.
It's days like these that I have to remember the good old days, about a week ago, when it wasn't raining.
It was my first day back at work after summer break, and a little girl and an older boy got in a fight.
I first went to the boy to get his side of the story (there is usually two sides). He said the girl was pulling on his rat tail, I wanted to say "that's what you get for growing a rat tail," but I didn't. Instead I asked the girl if had, in fact, pulled his rat tail. She said "yes, but I'm really trying to turn it all around, and I don't think the boys are putting in the effort."
I couldn't believe this was coming from a five year old!
I can tell which kids pay attention at home, by what comes out of their mouths at school.

Aside from work, I 've been keeping myself pretty busy with school. But I don't feel like I'm learning all that I need to be.
I'm basically just freaking out about my SAT.
It really is all I can think about. I'm sure I'm going to do poorly on the test, due to my inability to do well on any test, as well as the fact that I don't know half the stuff I should know.
I AM GOING NUTS!!!!
Other than my fear of my biggest test thus far. I am doing great.
Peace.